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No Birthdays, No Anniversaries
Will a relationship survive without special days?
Every year, we expect a call from Jenny. There’s going to be a surprise birthday party for her beau — again. Every year, without fail since they came together, Jenny throws a surprise party for Joe, and my husband Francis, being Joe’s best bud, must never miss it for the world.
It’s a sweet gesture though surely, Joe is never surprised by this anymore. To Jenny’s credit, however, she has never failed to surprise with the details of the party that’s always booked in whatever was the fanciest watering hole of the year. So though the party itself has come to be pretty much expected, with the “surprise” having lost its point, the surprise is in the details that always turn out to be new, different. And Joe, of course, revels in it, in this yearly grand gesture of love.
“I hate surprises.”
Francis makes a show of scoffing. What he’s actually saying: don’t feel pressured by Jenny’s example. Also: he can’t throw a party like that for me either.
“That’s their thing. Our thing is to plan things together…right?”
Actually, both Francis and I are terrible at planning. We can wing it, but not plan it. We’ve got each other to console when big plans go awry.